SEXdotED
by gotToluvAnime
Summary: Everybody in class including Hotaru was assigned in their SEX ED to make a short list of how grown up people define sex. Hilarity then ensues. Inner, outer, three lights and Mamoru… Rated M to be sure...


**A complete and utter nonsense. You've been warned.**

**THANKS to impersonal for beta reading this!! love lits!**

**Summary: Everybody in class including Hotaru was assigned in their SEX ED to make a short list of how grown up people define sex. Hilarity then ensues. Inner, outer, three lights and Mamoru…**

* * *

**SEX.ED**

* * *

Hotaru asks her Haruka-papa and Michiru-mama to gather all the inner senshis as well as Mamoru and the three lights to meet in their very home. Haruka cringes as soon as the idea of Seiya in their household came to light. She really doesn't like the idea, but, seeing her lovely daughter eager to have all of them in their very home, Haruka can't help but to sigh in defeat and have it Hotaru's way. The meeting day finally came and everybody went in one by one through the front door.

"Welcome Ami, Makoto, Rei and Minako," Haruka welcomed with a smile as she held the door open for them to come in.

They returned the greeting with a smile and gladly went in.

"Mamoru and Usagi," Haruka continually smiled as she welcomed the two young couples in. She continued the warm greeting as she saw another two men behind them. "Yaten and Taiki," she smiles and gestured them inside.

Her eyes travelled back to the door and her smile disappeared at once.

The black hair bishounen smiled and started off with his greeting.

"Ha-…" but was soon cut off by Haruka slamming the door on him.

"HEY!" Seiya whined as he slammed his hands on the wooden door.

The blonde ignored the complaining Seiya outside and started walking to the living room where everyone is. She took her sit beside her lover and gestured Hotaru to go on. The little girl nodded and jumped off from the sofa. She walks to the center and climbed herself on top of the high chair. After settling, she clears her throat and began her speech:

"I asked everybody here for one reason," raising her hands up as she said them. Everyone followed each and every movement her hands make while she continued with her speech "My teacher asked us to make a list of how grown up people like you would define it."

"It? What's 'it'?" Haruka questioned, raising one of her eyebrows in confusion.

"Answer it one by one," the little girl continued explaining.

"It?" Michiru rose from her seat a little, adjusting her position; leaning much closer to the blonde.

Hotaru cleared her throat "So let me start asking it."

"It?" all the other senshis said in unison.

"What is sex?"

Everyone's eyes just popped out and mouths hit the floor at that question. Setsuna gagged the water she was drinking while Haruka and Michiru gawked at the kid before sweating quite nervously. Minako had her devious smile on as she glances over at Sailor Mars while Rei glared back at the giddy blonde. Ami had her blushing face hid behind her book while Makoto completely had her stare away from Ami. Taiki, Yaten and Mamoru just kept rubbing their nape, while our beloved overly innocent with pure untainted minded Sailor Moon just had a big question mark on top of her head.

After a minute of awkward silence, the black haired kid asked once again now with eagerness emitting from her eyes.

"What is sex?"

Haruka cleared her throat and spoke in behalf of the adults in the room, "Taru-chan, why don't me and Michi-…"

"Oooh! I know that it's starting when Mamo-chan starts tying me up in a rope!" Usagi raised her hands proudly up in the air as she turned to look at her beloved husband.

Everybody quickly turned their attention to Mamoru who had surprised, embarrassment and terrified looks painted all over his face in a mixture. "Ah, Usagi we should let Haru-…"

"Remember, the one you always do at night; ropes, chains, cuffs. What else?" the bun headed girl elaborated one by one to which Mamoru had to blush even harder.

"Usagiiii-…" he gritted trying to keep his wife from talking any further.

Haruka quickly got up from the sofa leaving her leaning lover falling onto the armrest. "MAMORUUU!!" Haruka shot him a deadly glare as she took heavy steps towards him. She instantly and roughly grabbed his collar "How dare you abuse my koneko-chin?!"

"No, it's not what you think-…" He defended but Haruka kept her hold as she growled continuously.

"Ruka! Will you quit it," Michiru spoke from behind.

Haruka ignored her lover's voice and just kept growling and growling at him.

"It's called bondage, Haruka-san," Mina voiced out proudly, which quickly earned her a pair of green orbs looking straightly at her. "It seems Mamoru-san has some weird fetish to these sorts of things."

"Fetish? Why would tying someone up be a turn on?!"

"Some men like it that way, feeling sort of dominant. Seeing your woman pleading and in a very defenseless position might be…exhilarating, wild and more pleasurable. All you want to do is fuc-…"

"AAHHHH! Don't say such words in front of our daughter!" Haruka screamed quickly, tightening her hold a little harder.

Mamoru's face instantly went pale "Can't… breathe…"

Michiru quickly took Haruka's hands off from the bishounen and led the blonde to take a sit beside her. Haruka just kept growling then had her eyes set on Minako, as she asked "how come you know these sorts of things?"

Minako smiled smugly before standing up from her position. "I'm the senshi of love of course!" She walked over the host and petted her soft silky black hair. "Hotaru-chan, I'll tell you what sex is."

"Wait! Don't taint my daughter's mind!"

"We can trust Minako, Haruka-san. After all, she's the most reliable one to explain these things," Makoto commented.

Haruka hesitated and was about to walk over to Minako but was soon stopped by a reassuring voice of Rei Hino. "Yes, we should trust her on this one."

Haruka grunts but sat back on the sofa cuddling next to her lover.

"I'm not really good equating sex with anything but I'll try to do some justice to it. I'll make it simple enough for you to understand."

Hotaru's eye instantly glimmed with utter happiness by then and Minako just had to smile a lot wider.

"Alright, Sex.. hmm… Sex is… Sex is Rei-chan!"

The watchful eyes of Ami, Makoto, Michiru, Haruka, Setsuna, Usagi, Mamoru, Taiki and Yaten quickly went to the eyes popped out and jaw dropped face of Rei.

"I don't get it," pouted Hotaru.

Minako smirked and continued, "well let me explain it to you. You see Rei-chan-…" and before anything unwanted be uttered by Minako, Rei rushed to her side and quickly smacked the blonde across her head. "Umphff!"

"What the hell, Minako!"

"That hurts Rei-chan!" Minako faked a hurt expression. "But that turned me on." And she smiled seductively after second

"Shut your mouth, stupid blonde!"

"Ooohhh, I like this side of Rei-chan too!"

"Why would you equate me to such vile act!"

"Why not? You're the only one I'm doing it with. I think it's suitable to," Minako defended earning yet a deadly glare from Rei.

Haruka snickered from behind to which both women has their eyes turned to her. "A priestess to engage in such activity... the indecency, the lewdness, the profanity… I never thought you were that kind of girl Rei-san." Haruka teased while smiling ever so cockily at them.

"I am not!" shouted angrily as Rei defended herself.

"I like it though, being tied up," the bun head girl commented out of the blue.

"Usagiii!!" Mamoru whined as he tried to stop her wife.

"Princess, you shouldn't be happy about that! He's completely taking advantage of you"

"As I said, it's not like what you're thinking, Haruka-san."

"Not?! Tying up a girl in a rope is not taking advantage of her?!"

"Well, when the other likes it though…" remarked Mamoru in a whisper

"Hush Haruka. It's not like you don't do the same to me," silenced Michiru as she tapped her lover's shoulder.

"Of course I don't Michiru! I would never tie you up."

"I don't mean that. What I meant was it's not like you don't have any fetishes."

"Of course I don't have!"

"The nurse costume, the school gym clothes, swimming suit" elaborated one by one by the sea nymph resulting to the people around to look at the tall blonde mischievously. Michiru continued "the bunny rabbit, the school uniform, sometimes my sailor outfit, the-…"

"MICHIIII!!"

"Kyaa!! Cosplaying! I also do it with Rei-chan, Haruka-san!" Minako said appraisingly as she gave Haruka thumbs up.

"We do not!!" Rei threw another deadly glare as she grabbed the senshi of love by the collar.

"You don't have to be embarrassed!" teased continually by the blue eyed blonde. Rei just had to gripped harder. "I--… you're… holding me…too… tightly…. Rei-chan…"

By this time everyone in the room had their own conversation.

"Michi, you didn't have to tell them about that!"

"I was just proving my point that it's normal."

"I know-…"Haruka grudgingly replied but continued in a soft whisper. "but it's our secret!!"

"Hmm. Sex..." pondered the laid back bishounen sitting by the couch.

"You like it hard, don't you Taiki?" the other silver haired bishounen commented taking Taiki completely in beet red.

"I do," murmured Taiki.

The smaller bishounen moved in closer and cuddled under the strong pair of arms of the other man.

"Everyone, having fetishes is pretty normal," Ami uttered softly. Everybody ignored the shy blue haired girl and continue on with their own conversation. "In most cases, this sort of things actually-…"

"I don't think it's necessary to tell them, Ami," Makoto said, placing her hand on the other woman's shoulder.

"What is sex!" a little girl's voice shouted, completely stopping everyone from what they're doing.

The room was soon engulfed in a very awkward silence as all only looked at each other hesitantly.

"Uhm… Hotaru-chan, if I may, Sex is actually…" Ami's voice was first one to break the silence. Everyone turned their attention to the voice direction and gasped as they found Ami speaking. They couldn't believe of all people it has to be Ami. They gulped in unison as all waited for the blue haired beauty to continue. "Sex is the act in which the male reproductive organ enters the female reproductive tract, called copulation or coitus in other reference."

"WHAT? What do you mean only men and women can do such act!?"

"Yeah!!"

"Michiru and I do it every time and it doesn't include penile insertion!"

"Same here with Rei-chan!" backed up by Minako earning another glare from Rei

"We do not!"

"Alright, we use double headed dildo," Minako said in defeat, raising her hands up.

Rei grunted and was about to hit the blonde again not when a male's voice quickly got her attention… well everybody's attention

"I agree!" Yaten opposed. "Taiki and I do it regularly!" and shouted ever so proudly. The said man just hid his blushing face behind one of the throw pillows.

Everybody looked at the two men and Yaten just had to question. "What? You guys are as gays as we both are."

"I just wonder how you guys do it," Haruka mused.

"As well as we are to you guys," Yaten responded.

The two looked at each other for another couple of seconds before dismissing everything between them. The couples turned their attention back at Ami who now had herself shivering from it.

"Sex doesn't have anything to do with it!"

"Well, I'm just saying what we learned in school." Ami defended. "But, you know, sex is the highest form of physical love."

"Damn right it is!" Yaten shouted

"But what about strangers doing it?" Haruka questioned

"Well, pleasure then?" Ami added

"It could be. But sex without love... hmmm…" Minako pondered aloud

"I don't know. Please just disregard my answer." She pleaded, near to teary eyes.

"Do you love me, Mamo-chan?" Usagi again uttered out of the blue as she focused her undivided attention to her husband.

"Of course I do." He replied sincerely.

"It's not love, princess! It's slavery. Slavery I tell you"

"Haruka-san, I said it's not anything like that."

"Ruka stop saying that! No injection to the naughty patient tonight!"

"Michiii!!" whined the tall handsome blonde.

"Would Rei-chan like to some treatment tonight?" Minako asked as she gave the black haired goddess some pretty eyes.

Rei cocked her brow and quickly gave Minako a poke on the forehead. "Like hell I would!"

The living room was out of control as all were having their own disputes. The only time the room quieted down was when Makoto spoke up. "We haven't answered Hotaru-chan's question!"

All quickly stopped again from what they're doing and answered one by one in shame "yes, we haven't."

"Alright, since we're not capable to answer such thing, why don't we let the more experience to answer this one?" Makoto suggested.

"Why don't we let the oldest answer it?" Haruka proposed afterwards to which all had nodded their heads in agreement.

All turned their attention to the quietly green haired goddess sipping her hot coffee sitting by the one person leather couch. Everyone had their seemingly hopeful eyes on and the woman in focus just had to sigh.

"Don't ask me.I don't get any at all."

"Wait you mean you never had one?" Minako raised.

Setsuna nodded in shame.

"Even at least to a second base?" Yaten added.

Setsuna again nodded.

"So let me get this, you have all of this women juice stuck in there," Haruka pressed further.

Setsuna groaned then nodded. She hates this kind of attention, that's why she mostly avoids this sort of situation.

Haruka's face just went from surprised down to sorry. She quickly made her way to Setsuna followed by her lover by her side. "Michiru and I will help you. Let us do it with you!" Haruka proposed sincerely

"Will you quit it!" Setsuna replied angrily as she slaps the blonde's hands from her.

"But, Set-chan, it's unhealthy to keep it all in there!"

The other senshis nodded in agreement.

"Taiki and I would do the honor of helping you out Setsuna-san, even if it irks us," Yaten suggested thoughtfully.

Setsuna growled even louder.

"Rei-chan and I would be pleased to have you join us!" Minako lovingly proposed.

"Even if I despise the idea, I want to help Setsuna-san," Rei simply added.

Setsuna glared at everybody and growled at their stupid reactions. She doesn't have any interest in doing it, she doesn't even want to think about it. And receiving this sort of sorry offers, sympathy reaction, and pity actions, she can't help but be overly angry and utterly annoyed by this and most of all at them.

"I don't even give a damn!"

"You see piling those woman juice in there, results to this."

"And it's impossible that you don't want to do it. You'll like it with me."

"Even better with me," a couple of people added in unison.

By this time, everybody had their attention focused on Setsuna instead on the kid who held this meeting. Hotaru sighed frustratingly, and climbed down from where she stood. She walked pass the adults and yawned as she made her way up in her room. Everyone didn't even saw Hotaru leaving, I don't think everyone even noticed that she already left and went to sleep.

* * *

**-Outside the Outer's House-**

Seiya sat on the door step his chin resting in his left palm while doing doodles on the concrete pavement with his other hand. He sighs long and low before making another saddened pout.

"I wish I was in there to join in the fun."

* * *

**-Day after-**

After the school bell rang, the teacher quickly told everyone to place their assignments on her desk. Hotaru immediately placed her paper on top and left the room and went home as soon as possible. When the room was all cleared out of students, the teacher went directly to her table and grabbed the papers. She read each and every paper submitted by her students and smiled and laughed at their answers.

"_My okaa-san said my otou-san is a sex machine." - Taneda Miyuki_

"_Okaa-san said that it's like putting a pencil inside a really small hole. Onee-san said it's like eating a really big hot dog. Tama said meow meow." - Hinabi Yukito_

"_Sex causes chaos… I don't ever want to grow up." -Tomoe Hotaru_

* * *

**Thanks for rreading! pretty disturbing right?lol**

**Nonsense, I know. Please don't hate me. lol**

**REVIEW!! **


End file.
